1st Verse
Does it rain in Melbourne?
Does an Aussie like a pie?
Does a woman dance backwards?
Is the Nullabor dry?
Does the Kookaburra make a row?
Would you like to play for Penrith now?

2nd Verse
Is a woman called a sheila?
Does an Aussie like a root?
Have you ever known a virgin?
Is the esky in the boot?
Does the old lady still know how?
Would you like to play for Penrith now? (this line not sung if the 3rd verse not sung)

3rd Verse (not usually sung)
This game they play in heaven,
Puts the old bones to the test,
And I've had another good day,
But I'm feeling like a rest,
So would you please pass the port round now,
And raise your glass to _____________ (name of visiting club) now!!

4th Verse
Would you
Like to play for Penrith,
Like to play for Penrith,
Like to play for Penrith, NOW!!